Quirky Monday: The One with The Tree--And my First Bite from the Theatre Bug

When I was three years old, two things happened: I got bronchitis for the first time, and  I played a tree.

That's right.

A tree.

A tiny little-3-foot-pine-tree that no one wanted for Christmas.

Did I mention that I was already scrawny and undersized anyway so the casting was perfect?

A friend of my mom's had written a cute little Christmas play for our Church Christmas party. She had everyone else, but she needed someone to play the little tree.

Me.

I got to stand center stage for twenty minutes and get sneered at by snobby ladies, kicked by spoiled brats, and finally adopted by a sweet family who wrapped me up and took me home, the end.  The best part?

I had a solo.

The playwright had taken Christmas carols and written new lyrics.  Things like:

"Buy our trees/If you please/ We can't wait all day/ Cash your check or credit card/ we don't care just pay." (sing that in your head to the tune of Jingle Bells, and you'll get an idea.)

My solo was to the tune of "Silent Night", and I got to sing it all by myself, in front of an audience. Or so I thought. Originally, the plan was to have the audience sing with me, so I wouldn't be scared of singing alone.

I'm sorry. Me? Scared of singing alone? Was she insane? This was my song and I was going to sing it by myself, thank you very much.

So I practiced. And I practiced, and I went to rehearsals, and got my costume and was so ready to perform...

And the night before the performance, I started hacking up a lung.

Literally.

Bronchitis.

I was sniffing and coughing so much I couldn't breathe, and my throat was the size of--I don't know, something really big.

What if they had to cancel the show? What if I got fired? What if I let everyone down?(In my three-year-old mind, the show would blow up if I didn't show and my theatre career was ruined.)

But, I did make it to the show. My mom bundled me up and got me in the car and wouldn't let me take my coat off until I got on the stage. I got up on that stage and grabbed my mic and started...croaking(to the tune of Silent Night):

"Cod id da nide/Doe wod id side/Win-der wid/whirls ad bides....."

And that was just the first line. But I was in the show, and I was going to perform.

The theatre bug bit me that night. Bit me hard.

I haven't left since.