Monday, August 31, 2015

Quirky Monday: Gag-amole--and Other Things You Couldn't Pay Me to Eat

There are a list of foods I will not eat. Ever. It's a short list, but it's a list, none the less.

I have the world's weakest gag reflex. Seriously, anything that squishes, or sounds squishy or feels squishy, I have issues with. It's bad.

Especially if it squishes in my mouth.

Ok, maybe about fifty percent of the time if it squishes in my mouth.

Cream, I can eat fine;  apple crunch, cobbler, pies, fine. Yes, I will eat them . Jello I will eat. Squash I will eat. Pickles I will eat.

Tomatoes? Kill me.

Cold cereal(or hot cereal) with milk(and sugar and all that other stuff people put on it)?  Not so much.

Guacamole?  Not on your life.

Avocados? Sharp stick please. In my eye. Now.

Actually, looking at it like this isn't the bad part. It's when  I can see the inside that it gets bad. 

I don't like the way it looks; I don't like the way it smells; I don't like the feeling of it in my mouth. At all. Like ground up snot--or something equally gross.

The funny thing is, that with the other foods on this "gag list"(and I didn't even give you the rest of them), I can watch other people eat them just fine. Just don't offer me any. Avocado/Guacamole is a different story.

When I was at girl's camp, we had a "spa day" where one of the leaders made guacamole and cocoa powder face masks that we all go smeared on your faces. The.Worst. Forty-five minutes. Of. My. Life.

Avocados are almost as bad. Same deal--the look of it, the feel of it, the smell of it. I accidentally tasted it once(nobody told me it was in my salad!!!!) and I thought I was going to die.

Ok, maybe not die, but there was definite nausea going on in my body. Ick. Ick, ick, ick. Sometimes my mom and sister still have it in their salad or something, and it's all I can do not to gag.

Don't ask me why, but there are some foods I will never, ever eat, even if my life depended on it.

Guacamole is one of them.

And it will always be a problem.

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